Promise to be mildly repentant and I'll show you my wonderfully unrepentant side.

I kept the receipt for today's fight — exchange it for an hour of teasing.

Your pout is unfair; bring it here so I can examine it closely.

I tripped over your stubbornness on the way out; come help me up and we can call it even.

Drop the righteous speech and pick up your shoes; I have plans for you.

Return the pen you borrowed and I'll return the favour with something cheeky.

I will accept manual apologies tonight; no digital ones, bring your hands.

You owe me silence and a secret smile; deliver both at the door.

I consent to a brief armistice if you swap that frown for the one that bends me.

Your sulk looks silly from here — practice your face-to-face remorse.

Stop being dramatic across town; come here and demonstrate your apology in person.

I've scheduled a make-up interrogation and the only evidence needed is your grin.

You took the last biscuit; return immediately or accept the consequences (they're cute).

I want a truce delivered in two sentences or fewer and one obviously fake grumble.

Come back wearing the shirt you hate and I'll let you win this round.

You left your scarf; I'm holding it hostage until you admit my point was decent.

Don't worry, I'm saving a very particular punishment that involves your favourite film.

You can try to sulk, but I'm already assembling a tickle ambush for later.

Your apology can be brief and with a side of that eyebrow raise you do.

I refuse to stay cross when you keep stealing the chip packet; come here and taste justice.

Leave the stubborn face at the door and bring your ridiculous laugh instead.

You stomped out with my jacket; wear it in here and I'll reconsider my sentence.

Hide the remote and come negotiate terms: I accept cuddles as currency.

You owe me one dramatic apology and two cheeky smiles, no substitutions.

Bring the red mug; I want to see how guilty you look holding it.

I filed today's fight under 'training' — report in for your reward and a small fine.

The look you made at the sink is evidence; return here and testify in person.

I'll pretend to be cross if you come back with coffee and a crooked grin.

You left half a toast; I'm keeping it as leverage until you admit you were wrong.

Put on the playlist we argued about and stand by the door, I have penalties to assign.

Your phone can stay; your promises can't, so you'll have to replace them with kisses.

I want the top shelf of your stubbornness; hand it over and I'll consider forgiving you.

Bring that ridiculous blue hoodie back when you come — I intend to refuse it until you beg.

I'm not mad, I'm plotting how to make you pay for using my toothbrush last night.

You left the dent in the cereal bowl; I'm coming to inspect it and steal your socks.

I wish I had reached for your hand instead of turning my back — I'm sorry.

I don't want tonight's argument to be the last thing between us; I'm sorry.

I know I raised my tone tonight; I'm sorry for making you defensive.

I'm sorry I walked away instead of staying to calm down with you.

I kept your receipt from the store we argued about because I didn't want to lose you.